


It was enough

by Codango



Category: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Genre: Bodyguard, Diary/Journal, F/F, Pining, Secret Crush, Yuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-08
Packaged: 2018-04-19 19:30:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4758191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Codango/pseuds/Codango
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lili could feel her face getting warm, and she sat up from her diary. It had been a relief to finally admit to herself that what she felt went beyond admiration. Beyond patriotism.</p><p>She doodled a fiery sun in the corner of the book. The effect wasn’t exactly in keeping with the stoic professionalism of its contents.</p><p>While there might be a slight possibility that the princess was similar to Tetora and Ayura — lovers of good people no matter who they were — Lili held no hope that she herself would ever garner Yona’s affection.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It was enough

Tetora had been watching the young brunette for about fifteen minutes now. It was impossible to say exactly how long the Water Tribe General’s daughter had been staring broodily at the candle on her desk.

It was the third sigh in as many minutes that prompted the blonde bodyguard to nudge her companion. Ayura raised her head from her logbook to size up Lady Lili’s morose expression.

The rainy night added to the overall melancholy of the room.

Tetora was about to implode from the depressing evening.

Lili began to chew on her calligraphy brush, staring deeply into the tiny flame.

Tetora finally snapped. “Trouble at the clinics today, my lady?” she asked, her tone bright.

Ayura shot her a look. “The clinics?” she mouthed.

Lili blinked. She stared at the brush protruding from her mouth. Then, far too casually, placed it next to a half-finished letter. The general’s daughter never was able to pull off nonchalance, but she would still try.

“Ah, aha, yes.” Lili flashed a smile from her desk at her two bodyguards. “There’s always far too much to do at the Nadai clinics. I don’t know how I ever thought I could go back to Suiko, really.”

 _Ah. Homesick?_ “Do you often think of Suiko Castle, my lady?” Tetora asked delicately.

Ayura’s face let it be known that the question had not, in fact, been very delicate at all.

Lili looked stunned at first — _perhaps that was a bit forward of me_ — then burst into laughter. “No! I love my father, but no. This…” Lili swept a hand at the luxuriously appointed room. “... this is my home now. My base of operations.” She stood. “So much to do here, I’m overwhelmed by the opportunity. And sleep! Got to sleep. Why, I’ve been staring at a wall for at least five minutes! Good night, Tetora, Ayura.”

And Lili closed the door to her bedroom on the other side of the small suite.

“Five minutes.” Tetora grimaced. “Tell me it wasn’t an hour.”

Ayura closed her logbook. “You should have waited for her to tell us what her restlessness was about. Now we’re in for this awkwardness for at least one more night.”

Tetora glanced at her solemn, dark-haired companion. “You don’t need telling any more than I do.” The blonde bodyguard put her hands on her hips and faced her charge’s bedroom door once again. “It’s Yona.”

* * *

 

Lili threw herself on her futon. She’d given up her feather bed as soon as Yona had left Sensui. It had just felt wrong to enjoy a real bed. Especially when the princess of Kouka was sleeping on the ground in a tent surrounded by six men.

She reached for her diary. Yona was surrounded by bodyguards instead of servants. She spent her days learning how to fight instead of how to entertain powerful political guests.

_Ordered a dozen yards of bed linens. The Maru clinic has only two changes per bed — very undersupplied. We will be lucky to have them within a month._

_Supervised a water testing at the Kita clinic. I’m hopeful that the head physician’s concerns are unjustified. We will know in three days._

_Met with three noblewomen about organizing a soap-making charity. It is a much needed supply, and a genteel enough endeavor that they can feel proud to involve their friends and servants._

Lili stared at her notes.

They felt so… dispassionate. So utterly methodical.

She rested her forehead on the stitched-together book. Heaved a sigh.

It was all necessary work.

Valuable work.

She knew that.

But overseeing Nadai clinics from here to Shisen could never be compared to rallying merchant ships. Fighting off pirates. Standing by Yona’s side against overwhelming opposition.

Lili closed her eyes.

And let her mind be transported to days filled with righteous anger and delicious tension and red hair and fiery eyes and noble purpose.

She smiled.

And evenings filled with soft laughter and shared food and hot springs.

Lili ached for it all.

She wanted her princess.

Lili could feel her face getting warm, and she sat up from her diary. It had been a relief to finally admit to herself that what she felt went beyond admiration. Beyond patriotism.

She doodled a fiery sun in the corner of the book. The effect wasn’t exactly in keeping with the stoic professionalism of its contents.

While there _might_ be a slight possibility that the princess was similar to Tetora and Ayura — lovers of good people no matter who they were — Lili held no hope that she herself would ever garner Yona’s affection.

She had spent several days in Yona’s company after all. The redhaired princess smiled at positively everyone and laughed with all of her men, but her eyes followed one person.

And it wasn’t Lili.

Lili shut her diary firmly. Stood and placed it on a shelf. She took her time tugging the pins out of her hair, letting the long dark strands fall where they would.

It was enough, she had decided, that she was doing work to benefit the princess’ kingdom. For Kouka was Yona’s — no doubt of that existed for Lili, never mind who sat on the throne. The love the young woman had for her country practically burned from her violet eyes.

That was a love Lili could answer.

She would love her princess through caring for her kingdom.

It was enough.

Lili blew out her room’s lantern.

Snuggled under blankets that were still far too luxurious.

It had to be enough.

 

**Author's Note:**

> [@codango](http://codango.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr
> 
> [Marcella Christie](http://marcellachristie.com/) for my alter ego


End file.
